To Cut Or Not To Cut

November 13th, 2009 by Dionna | 14 Comments
Posted in My Family

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Tom and I are on the brink of deciding to give Kieran his first haircut, but we are sad and torn. I keep looking at pictures of Kieran and closing one eye or putting a finger in front of his curls, just to get an idea of what he would look like without the length. He would practically look like an adult. I mean, some bartenders might not even card him if he bellied up for a beer (on a high bar stool, of course).

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Kieran has now seen both of us get a haircut and has asked for one. Obviously an almost two year old doesn’t realize the permanence factor of what he is asking, though.

I’m also sensitive to comments about it, which is my own problem. (My standard response to the “m” word? Mullets are purposely shaped by scissors. Kieran’s sweet ‘do is the product of Mother Nature herself). Tom and I think his flaxen locks are beautiful. We promised each other we wouldn’t snip it until Kieran was at least three years old, but I think we’re both starting to feel the pressure. Perhaps his baby fine hair does look a little silly since he’s turning into such a big kid (sniff).

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So if we do get it cut, I want to do something special.

I would love ideas (and a tissue). I’m already thinking of doing it on his second birthday, because really, that day won’t be emotional enough for me.

Attempts to talk me down from the haircut ledge will not be turned away either.

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14 Responses to:
"To Cut Or Not To Cut"

  1. Rebecca

    Here is my hint, make sure that you hide the hair clippings in a very safe place, as some ill fate may come to them in a fit of kitchen cleaning by a well meaning but non attentive male who resides in your household.

    Oh, wait, that might just be at my house.

    No, I am not at all bitter about it. Seriously.

    We put off Amelia’s first haircut for a very long time, mostly, because like kieran, she didn’t have that much hair.

    The one thing we talk a lot about is, is that people go to school to learn how to cut hair, and that is why we don’t do it ourselves, (my effort to keep her from doing an at home hair cut job that would necessitate a very short hair cut or some awkward growing out stage). She seems to get that, and it is helpful. To keep costs down, we use the local beauty school for haircuts (the last time we were there, we got 2 haircuts and an eyebrow wax for just a little over $20, including the tip). It takes longer, because you have a teacher involved with the student, using your hair as a walk through. But, honestly, we love it. Makes haircuts a most of the morning adventure, but we were lucky, that we got Amelia and I in at the same time the last time, the girls moved around so we could sit next to one another, and off we went. And then the girl who did amelia’s put some cute little braids in it, and just made her look really cute.

    So our idea of a fun morning might be a little different than that of a family with a little boy, huh…

  2. Rebecca

    Ok, seriously, that stock icon they used is hilarious…totally non sensical extra post.

  3. Rebecca

    And because the last comment was non sensical, I was reading these two articles earlier this week, and thought that you might enjoy them.

    http://www.continuum-concept.org/reading/human-nature.html

    http://www.continuum-concept.org/reading/human-nature.html

  4. I think it’s up to you two. If you want to wait until he’s three, wait. If you think it’ll be a good thing to have some picture with a big boy haircut for his senior pics or something, cut it. Don’t let silly comments make the decision for you, though. I think the fact that Kieran is excited about the idea, might make it a little easier.

    As far as ideas go, I saw a Galician short film recently where a mom took a clipping of her grown son’s hair and braided it with some of her own. She then tied a ribbon around it and saved it in her dresser. If you and Tom could donate some hair, that would be a cool idea. Since you both have short hair, maybe using your earlier post on recycling old children’s books as a spring board for an idea would work. You could take one of Kieran’s favorite books and hollow out the center. Then tie a ribbon around his newly cut locks and save them there in that book. Just a thought.

    He’ll be just as beautiful and sweet after the haircut. Know that whether you take him to the hair dresser tomorrow or wait until he’s old enough to order that beer legally, he’ll always be your sweet boy (y mi muy querido sobrino).

  5. When I said that crappily constructed sentence about senior pictures, I meant senior yearbook. Spain is ruining my ability to write English.

  6. Emily

    My friend Juli cut her little guy’s hair, and it was also a hard decision for her, but once she did, Jonas looked like SUCH a BOY. He looked absolutely adorable. And every time I see him after a new fresh cut now, it still looks adorable, every time. It hasn’t changed his personality or the other special qualities about him, and after the fact it wasn’t as big of a deal to Juli. (kind of like the day after Christmas, or turning 30, ha) It’s inevitable that it will need to be done, so maybe since you’re thinking so hard about it, it’s an indication that it is time.

  7. Dionna   CodeNameMama

    Thanks for the link Rebecca! I have heard of continuum concept, but I haven’t read anything.
    Tammy – I really like the idea of weaving it in with some of my/Tom’s hair. Not sure how we would do that, but it’s a really sweet idea.
    Emily – I know it wouldn’t change him, but it’s just one of those threshold things that makes a mama’s heart ache, ya know? It’s just me being silly :)

  8. Emily

    I know, just trying to give you some encouragement, hehe! See you Sunday!

  9. Mich

    Jack’s hair got shaved in two spots in the NICU (for placement of a central line), so he got his first haircut early and without us even knowing until after the fact! But the nurse who did the first spot saved the hair for us. But it was more important for him to be treated than to agonize over the experience, so it wasn’t something I let myself get hung up on.

    I think it’s cute that K’s asking to get a cut. Why deny him? ;)

  10. Katje Sabin

    We didn’t cut Linc’s hair because he didn’t want it cut. The day he asked to have it cut, we cut it. It’s his hair, and with regard to decisions about his body, as much as I can I let him make them himself. Little guys have so little autonomy over their own bodies and lives, that when they’re given as much as possible and then given the reasons for why they cannot have it all (safety, money, etc.), they seem to accept it better.

    Just my two cents’ worth!

  11. Mom

    I would love Kieran just as much if he had hair down to his knees, or was bald a cue ball!!! If you want to let his hair grow, let it grow, if you want to cut it, cut it, I think that the two of you are putting so much thought and care and love into everything you do with Kieran that you will make the best decision.
    I do agree that he would look SO grown up if his hair was cut…I don’t know if GRANDMA is ready for that or not either!!!
    I know that answer wasn’t much help…but it is the way I honestly feel!!!

  12. Dionna   CodeNameMama

    (hugs) Mich – I don’t think that counts as a first haircut.

    Katje – thank you for the input!

    I think we might be leaning toward a small trim, assuming once we get the scissors out Kieran is happy with the idea. I will be sure to post before and after pictures if we go that route ;)

  13. Heather   xakana

    I personally think that the worst reason to do a thing is because you feel pressure from without. Decisions like this should be made because YOU feel it’s time, not due to other people’s preference.

    If it’s an argument of fashion–long hair IS what’s in fashion. If it’s just the natural ‘m’, then just get it shaped differently if it’s a concern. He wouldn’t functionally know the difference between a trim and a chop as far as haircuts go.

    He’ll still be the same cute little Kieran no matter what you do to his hair or don’t.

  14. MelissaAnn

    FYI: Sam talks about his hair cut all the time, reinacts it, and asks for it again and again. Ours went well!

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