“At no point in this post or elsewhere has Dionna said that you or anyone else who disagrees is “wrong”. She’s simply trying to change the prejudices of those who simply haven’t ever had any contact with nursing.”

I’m sorry, Tom, this is not entirely true. No, Dionna did not say that my statements were wrong, not directly anyway. But she didn’t say that she RESPECTED my opinions, either. She said she “respects my sister’s CHOICE” to go to another room to breastfeed, not that she respected my opinions. She posted an entire blog entry in response to how “wrong” she thinks my comments were. No, Dionna never said directly that me, or her brother, are WRONG in our thought processes. (or 20 other women on the mom2mom site for that matter) But she seems to refuse to acknowledge that people are entitled to different viewpoints other than her own. She says she can “agree to disagree” but I don’t think that she can. She says she doesn’t want this to “polarize” us, but if that was true she would have respect for a friend’s opinion that differs from hers. Perhaps I wouldn’t feel compelled to make this final statement to my conversation with the two of you if I hadn’t felt so singled out by you, Tom, when all I did initially was to state that I agreed with Monty’s first comment. And even as a female, I still agree with much of what he says.

For the record, I do not disagree with your intentions to make public breastfeeding more socially acceptable. I do disagree for you alienating people who don’t wholeheartedly agree with the way you choose to go about it.

I know nothing I say will be right in either of your eyes, and this will be the last you will hear from me on the matter. I just felt compelled to defend my position since I have felt under attack for simply agreeing with a different viewpoint than your own. This kind of thing happened with the Santa thing too (in fact in THIS string, you mocked my line of questioning about it with the Jesus remark) and I realize that there is no reason to express my opinion anymore. Happy blogging.

I have to give mad props to the man for stepping into the heart of like-minded folks and standing up for a counter position. Top shelf courage, Cuz! Seriously; I’m not sure I would be as interested in typing gobs upon gobs of messages to try and make any headway.

Likewise, I think it’s pretty cool that Dionna and her posse feel so strongly about something so passionate. There are always strength in numbers, akin to a bundle of sticks (ala fascia, symbolic parts of so many monuments).

Enter me, the “middle” guy. My internal reactions are probably pit-for-pat along with Monty’s. BUT, I’m probably not going to invoke the Angel of Death to correct my perceptions. Studies and statistics can reinforce either side of the debate until voila; stalemate. Especially when you rule out *.orgs as sources.

Monty, there’s nothing wrong with you feeling anything other than what you are. It’s your culture, and if those who ascribe to the whole “tolerance and diversity” mantra don’t accept and/or tolerate your culture, then they’re not as advanced as they claim to be.

Dionna (and crew), there’s nothing wrong with your message or even your practice in the slightest. However, you have a mountain to climb in convincing the masses. 4.5 years in a psychology program verify that a “Hell no, we won’t go” approach is the worst one to convince another. Full-blown wars have been fought over such an approach. Convincing takes a lot longer if done with a better approach. Patience and compassion for ALL will get your cultural change benchmarked vs. what a radical shift provides.

Just sayin’!

Surprise!

It’s not that YOU are wrong to be uncomfortable (my husband wouldn’t want to see his sister’s breasts, either, but he would never tell her not to nurse), it’s that the outlook people are being taught about women breastfeeding–that it’s all about the breast or that it’s akin to flashing in public–is wrong. In most cases, all you can see is the nursling’s head and maybe the skin on mom’s side or whatever the nursling pushes away from his or her face.

As for asking for it… my four month old could sign milk. By 9 months, she could ask for it verbally. Are you saying I should have punished her ability to communicate by depriving her of the healthiest thing I will probably ever do for her? No, I’m sure you’re not. It’s really the same thing, even if it doesn’t seem like it.

Two is the MINIMUM age recommended by every medical organization on the planet to set as the goal to nurse to. But, to put that in perspective, my minimum healthy weight would be 160lbs. Wouldn’t it be better for me to go past that, to a healthier 140? It’s the same for nurslings.

It’s strange, because few people in your generation nursed for so long (I, myself was nursed past age 2–I don’t recall any of it and I have a friend who was nursed to age 4 and doesn’t recall nursing, either–my sister had no idea she was nursed so long, actually, and was surprised to find out), but it’s only recently in human history that children have been nursed for such a short period of time and we’re finding out more and more that nursing longer (the worldwide average is 4.2 years, but that doesn’t mean every child nurses that long or stops that soon, obviously) may help prevent many of the issues assaulting us today that people in history didn’t have to deal with as much, such as diabetes, obesity and even cancer.

You can agree that it would be wonderful that, if because your sister followed her research and instincts, your nephew grows to be a psychologically secure man who lives past the age predictions of our generations? That is Dionna’s goal, indeed, the goal of all of us–to raise healthy, well-adjusted children who live long, happy lives and grow to have healthy attitudes for their own family.

Wouldn’t you want the same for your own grandchildren when/if they come? That is why Dionna wants nursing in public normalized–so women don’t have to feel that they have to hide at home or give their baby a bottle (not all women can pump and not all babies will take bottles) just because their little one still needs to nurse. No one is saying that there is anything wrong with women who prefer to cover up or step into a nursing room (if a nice one is provided–some are little more than filthy, cold, damp closets). But just as they should be able to nurse with comfort, so should a mom whose child will not tolerate a blanket (or who can’t get latched using one, or whatever reason she has for not using one). And the more it’s seen in public, the more it will just be the way it is and the fewer people will be uncomfortable with it.

Why is it wrong for me to be uncomfortable?
Why is it wrong for someone to say something if they are uncomfortable?
Why can’t the person ask?
Are you sure that nursing in public dosnt hurt anyone? (physically no)
Are you against bottle feeding of anytype?
You would be the first to say something back in a store, restraunt, bicycle shop etc if someone walked up and asked you to cover.

capital leters not yelling
I HAVE READ AND UNDERSTAND WHAT THE NUTRITION VALUE IS TO THE CHILD AND WHAT IT DOES FOR NURTURING. I AM NOT DEBATING THIS.

Dionna’s and your point is that normalizing breastfeeding in public is that everyone should be comfortable CORRECT?

My point is I am not comfortable, wether I move or not, you are not in my brain and can not answer for me PERIOD.

I still hate changing my clothes in a locker room, I will wait as long as i can to do it and I am 43 years old. (SIMILE)

My other point on this matter is that not everyone will be comfortable and there will be people that will not breastfeed in public and there will be people that will say things to others that do breastfeed.

and finally Yes I have debated this intesively, you keep telling me to feel comfortable and I will not, its my choice, and it is your choice to tell me but dont tell me that my problem is its normal for everyone, its normal for you, Dionna and your AP friends, there are others that you are not being considerate about. THIS IS MY DEBATE

ONE MORE TIME: I KNOW THE BENEFITS OF BREASTFEEDING, I AM NOT COMFORTABLE AROUND IT AS OTHERS IN THIS WORLD.