My Pregnancy Support System

March 16th, 2012 by Dionna | 11 Comments
Posted in Carnival and Special Series, Consensual Living, Just for Fun/Miscellaneous, My Family, natural parenting, Pregnancy and Birth

Welcome to the Pregnancy Necessities Carnival!
This post was written for inclusion in the Pregnancy Necessities Carnival hosted by Parenting God’s Children. Today, participants share what they simply cannot live without during their pregnancies or simply what to gather for their upcoming new addition. Please see the full list of links to the other carnival submissions at the end of this post. Enjoy!

When I first started contemplating the things I could not live without while pregnant, the obvious came to mind – friends, my chiropractor, comfy pillows to put between my knees, meditations to calm my nerves, cloth pantyliners. (Really, I could not live without my pantyliners.)

But what I truly could not live without this pregnancy was my two boys. Here are a few reasons why:

My Involved, Supportive Boys

Kieran was there when I peed on the stick. Since Kieran and I spend just about 24 hours out of every day together, there aren’t many aspects of my pregnancy that Kieran did not join me in. The morning we found out we were expecting number two was shortly after we reentered our house after I almost set it on fire by burning chicken stock on the stove.¹ Kieran and I had slept in the guest bed, and Tom was on the couch (we did not have our replacement bed yet, and the bed was too small for three). We woke up, and Kieran said “let’s go take a pregnancy test!” We’d been trying for months, and he knew the drill.

Within seconds after I put the stick on the bathroom counter, Kieran’s little voice rang out, “Mama! You are pregnant!” I rushed in, thinking he was mistaken. Nope – that child knows how to read a pregnancy test, and he got to announce it. I love that!

Both Tom and Kieran helped me practice my yoga and meditations. After a rough labor and delivery with Kieran, I was nervous about a similar experience for #2, and so I spent a lot of time preparing my mind and body.

The mainstay of that preparation was meditation and yoga practice. The yoga helped my muscles prepare for the physical work of labor, and the meditation helped me convince myself to trust my body, to give control over to my body’s inherent birthing wisdom. Kieran often took part in both, and when I would forget to practice my relaxation exercises, he reminded me. Tom took an interest in my yoga, often telling me how beautiful I looked and commenting on how it must be the yoga that was helping me stay so fit during my pregnancy. It was nice to hear.

Both of my boys helped take care of me physically throughout my pregnancy. I was joking to some friends that one of my pregnancy must-haves is Tom’s hands – he gave me a foot or back rub almost every night once my weight gain started bothering me. And it was heaven. Kieran supported me by helping me carry things in from the car, by opening and closing doors for me, by helping me pick up around the house, and by becoming more independent in general. Tom also stepped up with his share of the household work, too. And he continues to do much more around the house now that I am tied to a baby more often than not.

My boys supported me emotionally during pregnancy. Tom and Kieran are both so good about listening and showing affection when I feel anxious or sad. It was nice to be able to deal with everyone’s feelings about adding a baby to our family dynamic. I believe that talking openly with Kieran about my own worries allowed him to express and process his own concerns as well. Tom is also good about reading when I need encouragement or a kind word, and he does not hesitate to reassure me verbally or offer a hug or shoulder.

Both Tom and Kieran provided just the right amount of support during labor. After I woke Tom up to start getting the birth pool ready (which we never used), I needed him to help me get through contractions on several occasions by doing the double hip squeeze. He never complained, but he did tell me later that the pressure I was asking for took every ounce of strength he had.²

When it came time to push, Tom’s calm demeanor was a rock that I could cling to. And one of the sweetest memories for me of Ailia’s birth was Kieran rubbing my head and saying “You can do this, mama!” I couldn’t have asked for a better birth experience with my family there to support me.

So while there are many material things that are nice to have during pregnancy, my true essentials were my family.

What could you not live without while pregnant?

***

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants!

• The Pregnancy Happiness List — That Mama Gretchen is half way through pregnancy number two and is spilling the beans on her pregnancy must-haves!
• What A Pregnant Woman Really Needs — Jennifer Hybrid Rasta Mama reflects on what items she could not live without during her pregnancy as well as those she wishes she had.
• Cravings of Another Kind — When reflecting on what made her pregnancy enjoyable, Adrienne at Mommying My Way discovered information is what she craved most of all.
• The Pregnancy Necessities — Kym at Our Crazy Corner of the World shares her top ten must haves for pregnant women.
• The Expectant Mom‘s List of Breastfeeding Stuff to Buy, or Not — Alicia at Lactation Narration shares a list of 10 breastfeeding products that the expectant mom might want to have on her shopping list, or not.
• Pregnancy Necessities with a Toddler In Tow — Amyables at Toddler in Tow lists several simple things that make pregnancy while parenting an older child much less stressful and more enjoyable.
• Ten Tips That Helped Me During Pregnancy — Kat at {Almost} Every Moment shares ten things that helped her get through her three pregnancies!
• First Trimester Staples — Megan BB from The Memoirs of Megan shares her first trimester “must haves”
• The Pregnancy Must Have — Jennifer at True Confessions of a Real Mommy shares the ONE thing she used almost daily, through all three pregnancies and suggests to all pregnant moms.
• Where to Find Cute Maternity Clothes — Lauren at Hobo Mama reviews which maternity clothing stores to hit or miss.
• My Pregnancy Support System — While there are many material things that are nice to have during pregnancy, Dionna at Code Name: Mama’s true essentials were her family.
• What I Needed During My Pregnancy While Still Breastfeeding — Jenny at I’m a Full-Time Mummy shares one of the things she needed during her second pregnancy while she was still breastfeeding her toddler.
• Ten Essentials for a HAPPY Pregnant Mama — Sarah at Parenting God’s Children is half way through her third pregnancy! She shares the things she‘s found to be essential to a happy pregnant mama.

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