Do Families Outgrow Attachment Parenting?

January 19th, 2015 by Dionna | 2 Comments
Posted in natural parenting

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I did an interview once with Sona from The Bump on attachment parenting. She mentioned that a lot of parents “leave” AP because they feel like it is an all-or-nothing philosophy.

It saddens me that because so many of the AP ideals revolve around babyhood, parents get confused about how AP could possibly apply to older children. But attachment parenting is about building healthy relationships. Period.

Nurturing relationships with our children does not stop at some magical moment when babies become toddlers. Or when toddlers become preschoolers. Building those secure relationships simply evolves.

Our nurslings wean, but we bond with them through snuggling and reading books.

Our children move out of our beds, but we connect with them while cooking pancakes together on lazy Saturday mornings.

Our little ones outgrow their carriers, but we continue to carry them in our hearts – and we show them that by making our relationships with them a priority.

Attachment parenting is not a short-term prescription, it is a lifestyle. Breastfeeding, babywearing, cosleeping . . . they are not requirements, they are simply tools we can use as part of that lifestyle. When those tools are outgrown, we find new tools (just as we would have done if one of those tools had not worked initially).

What about your family – did you “outgrow” attachment parenting? How did it evolve as your children got older?


Photo used with permission from Spirit-Fire via Flickr Creative Commons

2 Responses to:
"Do Families Outgrow Attachment Parenting?"

  1. I’ve heard it said before (and said many times myself) that every time you get used to some “stage” of your child’s development, they go and change and suddenly you have to adapt: find new methods to deal with a behavior, figure out how to adjust a nap schedule, feed more often or less often or offer different foods, find new activities to keep everyone entertained. AP is the same way. Sure, my son doesn’t want to be worn all the time anymore (although he still does love being carried if he’s tired!), but instead we go for walks together so we can explore his world. He may not breastfeed often anymore, but instead we cook together and try interesting new foods together. A hug and a kiss is not always enough to calm him down when his emotions are raging, but instead we find other ways to connect so that there is never a doubt that he is my priority. Parenting is all about being able to adapt to new situations, and AP works the same way!

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